Wives Submit 2.0

I had written a blog post several years ago about wives submitting.  But after rereading it I decided it needed to be updated and added to since Stephen said he wanted to post it after his sermon yesterday.   So here goes! But first scripture!

“Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.  Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them.” – Colossians 3:18-19

“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.  For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior.  Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.  Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot of wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.  In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies.  He who loves his wife loves himself.  For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body.  Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.  This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.  However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” – Ephesians 5:22-33

Submit.  That word alone makes women get all worked up.  They look at it as letting a man walk over them.  So first lets look at what that word, submit, even means. 

To yield, resign or surrender to the power, will or authority of another Webster 1828

It doesn’t mean that we become a door mat! It doesn’t mean that if we are in an abusive relationship to stay in it!! And one thing I get from that definition it is not forcibly done!

So what do these scriptures mean? Read it again! All of it! Because if you really read it all you should be worried about these scriptures if you are a man, not a woman.  So first lets go back to Genesis,

And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh.  And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man.  Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” –Genesis 2:21-25

Stephen and I got married and a week later moved 9 ½ hours away from anyone who even resembled family.  We were far too broke to do anything but spend time with each other!  For the first several years we would always joke (but being serious) and tell people never to do that! But now 11 days away from our 10 year anniversary….I would do this again in a heartbeat and wouldn’t changed a thing! Wouldn’t want more money, wouldn’t want to live closer! Nothing! Why because we did just what it said to do in Genesis.  We had nothing else to do but to spend time with each other, and to become one! It was also during this time where we began to figure out what we each could bring to the table.  We did this by trial and error.  I quickly realized that I would need to be the one who would feed us…poor thing can only cook a few things (granted those few things are awesome) outside of that…yeah just no! LOL!  We also realized that he would be the financial person (mainly because I would spend everything down to the last penny and he would make us at least attempt to save something) and so forth!

So now that you have a little bit of a back story on this, on to the submit part.  See we are called to submit to our husbands as the church is to submit to Christ! Does this mean that I have no say so in what my life looks like? No!! Because just like I said before we both bring strengths and weaknesses and we are suppose to help each other. But it does mean that the overall decisions are up to him to lead as he feels God is leading us as a family.  At times God is going to show him where to lead his family based on the influence of his wife!  But wait my husband doesn’t lead…what do I do?  You pray! You pray for him daily! And then you back off and let him lead.  Husbands….I promise your wives want you to lead! Even though they may not admit this or they may not even know they want to be led but I promise they do!  There is a song I heard years ago and I still stand by the fact that it is soo soo true! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yLr6G8Xy5uc

Now I said at the beginning of this post that the man should be more worried about these verses than the woman…why? Because go back and read it! Husbands love your wife as Christ loved the church…What did Christ do for His church? He died for her! He laid down his life for the church! So now what does that mean in a husband/wife relationship? Husbands LOVE your wives!  Do whatever it takes to protect her! Show her love, be there for her! Lay down your desires for what is best for your family!  And then lets go back to Genesis one more time!

So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of it fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate.  – Genesis 3:6-7

But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, “Where are you?” – Genesis 3:9

First off….ADAM WAS WITH EVE! What?!? Amanda, no! That’s not how we learned the story! What the heck?! Bottom line….men PROTECT your wives! Even if it seems like she doesn’t need or want to be protected! At the end of the day she does.  Next thing when the Lord called out to them who did he call out first? The man! Just like the quote Stephen said yesterday from JD Greear, “Spiritual headship is God telling the woman to duck so he can punch the man.” I laughed out loud when I first heard this but it is completely true!  Why in the world would I want the responsibly on my head! God placed the man to be the head of the household and regardless if he takes on this responsibly or not he will be held responsible for it!

So what is the bottom line of all of this! If the husband does his job it should be a dream to submit to him! But even if he doesn’t do everything right….pray for him, support him, don’t make it even more difficult on him!  Husbands, lead!!!  Lead well! Love her!